A horrific event happened in our community a few days ago.
Two wives saw their husbands off to work on a Sunday in rural Utah. They received their bodies back the next day in flag-draped caskets, delivered by a procession of hundreds of law enforcement officers and first responders on highways and streets lined with citizens holding flags and signs of support. Fire engines, with flags held on raised ladders honored these heroes from each overpass along the more than one-hundred-mile route.
There were no dry eyes. Every heart was broken.
Every heart is broken.
It is a grief that will never heal.
They were dispatched to an area to locate the source of several 911 hangups. Someone was in urgent need of their assistance. The need so desperate that the caller could not safely speak on the phone to dispatchers.
She must have been terrified.
She had good reason to be.
The shooter had violently assaulted his wife – again – in front of their children.
As the first officer on the scene was leaving, the shooter shot and killed him, using a high-powered rifle.
The second officer arrived on the scene, saw his coworker down on the ground and rushed to him to try to save his life.
The shooter killed him before he reached his brother-in-blue.
A third officer and his K9 arrived. The shooter shot them too. Miraculously, they both survived.
It takes a monster – a coward – to shoot and kill someone who is there to help a woman and her children – the shooter’s children. It takes unbelievable cruelty and a lack of all morality to shoot a human who is rushing to the side of his friend who has been shot – to kill a man running, not toward the gunman, but running toward an injured man on the ground. It takes someone with zero conscience, kindness, or empathy to shoot into a car containing an officer and a K9 as they arrive – before they even have a chance to get out of the car.
It makes my physically ill every time I think about what those moments must have been like for the heroes who were trying to help, for the woman who had been assaulted numerous times over the past few months, and the children who were forced to witness all of it. Every time.
My heart breaks thinking about the wives and children who saw their husbands, fathers, off to work and shortly thereafter received the crushing, disturbing, horrific news. Their lives are forever changed.
As the news of these senseless, cruel, crimes settled into my psyche, I wondered, where has empathy gone?!
Our society is seriously lacking in empathy from the highest levels of government – where cruelty abounds – to a guy in a rural community with a gun.
Could empathy have changed the outcome?
What if the shooter had empathy for his wife and his children? Perhaps he would not have violently abused his wife. Maybe he would have thought about the impact on her and on the kids.
What if the shooter had empathy for the officers trying to help his family? Perhaps he would not have gunned them down in cold blood when they arrived – before they even had a chance to determine what was going on, or speak to him or his abused family. What if he had thought about them, how they were doing their job, how they have hearts for the people they serve and protect, how they woke up that morning planning to help people out, and return to their own families at the end of their shifts?
What if the killer had empathy for the wives and children of those officers? What if he had considered how they looked forward to the husbands, and daddies, return that night. What if he had wondered what plans they might have together the next day or the upcoming weekend? What if he had given even the briefest thought about how his actions would destroy those families for years to come?
What if that murderer had given a single care about anyone besides himself?
Empathy Changes Everything.
If one human has empathy toward another human, another sentient being, it is impossible to purposely do them harm. Empathy changes hearts. Empathy would change our world. Change begins by caring for others and considering the effect our individual actions have on each other.
The Killer Cried
He cried for himself because he went to jail; a one-way trip.
He is charged with aggravated murder on multiple counts, capital offenses, as well as “…18 other charges, including four counts of attempted aggravated murder, a first-degree felony; endangering a police service dog, a third-degree felony; three counts of possessing an explosive, a second-degree felony; two counts of possession of a dangerous weapon with criminal intent, three counts of assault, unlawful detention and threatening violence, class A misdemeanors; and three counts of domestic violence in the presence of a child, a class B misdemeanor,” according to KSL News.
Prosecutors are seeking the death penalty.
I admit it – I have zero empathy for that murderer. That goes against my raising in which I was taught to love others, to consider forgiveness, to take the high road. Whatever the high road means. Choices have consequences and his choices were so egregious and destructive. I don’t care that he will sit in a jail cell for the rest of his life. He chose that. I don’t care that he cries when he has an audience.
Does that make me less of a human somehow? Perhaps. I will sort that out with my Creator one day.
Maybe empathy could have saved those officers from receiving the instant death penalty that the killer doled out.
The monster cried like a baby and rocked back and forth in his first of many court appearances. He feels very sorry for himself.
What if he had felt anything for the men and the K9 who rushed to the aid of his terrorized wife and children?
What if he had an ounce of empathy?
What if we all had more empathy?
Would there be less violence? Less selfishness? Would there be no starving children on Earth? Would politicians consider the greater good when creating policy? Would genocide cease to exist? Would humanity stop torturing humanity (and animals)?
I believe so.
I pray so.
Sometimes empathy is painful. It can hurt to place ourselves in the shoes of another – to feel what they are feeling. But that connection is better than no connection, no heart, no compassion for others.
It is time. Time to flood our existence with empathy and compassion. Our world is broken. We are brokenhearted.
Let’s rise up with empathy. Change begins in each of our hearts.
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Have you experienced situations where empathy has played a role? Tell me about it. Let’s get this important conversation going. Thank you for reading – and responding. Your voice matters!
Jacque- thank you for speaking up about the power of empathy, especially in the wake of such heartbreaking violence. It’s hard to even process tragedies like this—families shattered, officers lost in the line of duty, and a community forever altered.
As someone who lives in the vicinity of Columbine High School and responds to tragedies like this through Project Linus, I completely agree that we need to find a solution to this horrific situation and aftermath.
What makes it even harder is knowing these stories are not isolated. Again and again, we see the same pattern: guns in the hands of someone deeply unwell, warning signs missed or minimized, and lives cut short in moments of senseless destruction.
Empathy is essential. It allows us to hold space for the grief of the families, the bravery of the officers, the trauma of survivors, and yes—even the brokenness of the man who caused it. But empathy alone won’t prevent the next tragedy.
We need laws that make it harder—not easier—for dangerous people to access weapons. We need stronger accountability when warning signs are ignored. And above all, we need to take mental health seriously, with real support before crisis becomes catastrophe.
Violence like this should never feel normal. The most “empathetic” thing we can do for one another is to push for change so fewer families, fewer officers, and fewer communities ever have to endure this kind of heartbreak again.
My eyes + heart are full of tears reading this... Empathy is the answer to many questions.